Our Little Secret

One day, Emily reached out to me unexpectedly through Facebook after coming across my Be A Brave Vietnamese project in Youth Time Magazine: https://youthtimemag.com/preventing-child-sexual-abuse-in-vietnam-the-story-of-my-duong/ 

She shared her personal story of being a survivor of child sexual abuse as a child, expressing how it profoundly affected her. In her message, she not only provided words of encouragement but also urged me to continue the Be A Brave Vietnamese project, spreading awareness about child sexual abuse prevention to a wider audience. Reading Emily's messages, my heart filled with a mix of empathy for the pain she endured and admiration for her resilient and optimistic spirit. Additionally, Emily shared that she had written and published a book about her life, which is sent from Canada and now rests on my bookshelf.

The book, titled 'Our Little Secret,' delves into the chilling significance behind those four words that haunted Emily throughout her life. They were the exact words whispered by her abuser, shackling her in pain for years. Emily's upbringing started in a once-warm family that eventually fractured. She resided with her father, who, amidst the pressures and chaos of life, found it challenging to provide both material and emotional care for his daughter. This upbringing devoid of love, familial warmth, and a yearning for protection shaped Emily's existence. Sadly, life's whimsical tales didn't smile upon her, as vulnerable Emily unwittingly became the target of her seemingly kind neighbor Richard, who feigned affection, pretending to love her like a daughter.

He approached Emily, showering her with love, only to inflict harm upon her when she was 15 years old. Gradually, Emily lost her sense of self, withdrawing from everyone and everything around her. Unable to join in the carefree activities of her friends, she became isolated. As I continued reading, I secretly hoped that Emily would swiftly grow up, escape from that harmful individual, leave the countryside behind, and build a life of her own, free from the burdens of her sad childhood. However, the consequences of child sexual abuse always linger for the victim, and Emily is no exception. She grew up carrying deep wounds in her soul, hindering her ability to fully open up to others and preventing her from forming her own family.

Despite enduring such prolonged pain, Emily resolved to keep this secret to herself, never revealing it to anyone. That was until, by chance, she unexpectedly crossed paths with Richard once again...

The day they crossed paths again, Emily realized that the pain from the past remained, regardless of the number of years that had elapsed. It was then that she truly comprehended the profound impact of Richard's actions on her life, and most importantly, she feared he would inflict the same suffering on others. Who could know for certain?

Determined to expose Richard's behavior and seek justice, Emily made the decision to hire a lawyer. However, it seemed as if fate was playing a cruel joke on her, as luck did not favor her and misfortune struck once more. The lawyer she had entrusted with her case turned out to be unreliable, perpetually feigning progress while leaving her waiting for two long years. By the time Emily discovered the truth and sought to rectify the situation, the statute of limitations for taking Richard to court had expired.

Emily felt utterly defeated. Yet, amidst her despair, she realized that what truly mattered now was not succumbing to tears and suffering, but rather ensuring that Richard's behavior was exposed to prevent him from harming anyone else in any way possible. Drawing from her own story and fueled by her love for painting, the book "Our Little Secret" was born.

Finding the right words to express my emotions after reading this book is a challenge. I despise the abuser, hold immense love for Emily, and feel anger towards the legal injustices that have exacerbated her suffering. However, amidst these sentiments, there is also a glimmer of joy. Emily has finally gained a fresh perspective, confronted her pain with bravery, and fearlessly shared her story to safeguard others and raise awareness about preventing child sexual abuse.

My hope is that somewhere, in any corner of the world, people are truly awakened to the fact that child sexual abuse can occur anywhere, in any guise, perpetrated by anyone. A child is not merely a child; they represent an entire lifetime. The actions of one individual, no matter how numerous, are not equivalent to the collective power of every person lending their voice to denounce these heinous acts and protect our children.

To Emily and the countless friends out there, I send a thousand words of love <3

“Our Little Secret,” written by Emily Carrington and published by Drawn & Quarterly, has won the 2023 Lynd Ward Graphic Novel Prize. Penn State University Libraries sponsors this juried award and its administrator, the Pennsylvania Center for the Book. The Lynd Ward Graphic Novel Prize is presented annually to the best graphic novel, fiction or nonfiction, published in the previous calendar year by a living U.S. or Canadian citizen or resident. The Penn State University Libraries, the department of English, and the College of the Liberal Arts are co-sponsors of this award.

Congratulations to Emily for all the incredible achievements she has accomplished, is currently pursuing, and will undoubtedly continue to achieve. Your positive impact is truly remarkable.